TWENTY BY TWENTY | 4 & 5

Since I managed to fail miserably at accomplishing this Twenty by Twenty nonsense in a timely manner, and I will no longer be twenty next month, I'm gonna start lumping these guys together. Also just gonna call it right now and say I will definitely not get to twenty by the time I'm twenty-one. To that end, something important I've learned about myself throughout this series is that I am not nearly as full of wisdom as I once thought. Who knew?

So, because I'm brave and courageous and all that, I have decided to tackle two of the scariest topics known to adolescence: trying new things and change. Because while, yes, horror movies about killer dolls are terrifying, there's a much smaller chance you will get mutilated by a ceramic colonial child at some point in your life than there is that you will experience some form of change or be forced to try something new. I'm being practical here. 

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TWENTY BY TWENTY | 3. it's okay to care what people think

"Now that you've told us some of your strengths, why don't you tell us about some of your weaknesses?" asks the portly interviewer who has had this job for far too long and is spending their lunch hour interviewing candidates for a job nobody wants, but everyone needs. 

"Well, sir (or madam because, duh, it's 2017), I care too much." says the person who is so sure they are nailing this job interview with their totally original answer. 

This whole scenario hits a little too close to home for me. This is mainly because caring to an obsessive and unhealthy degree is not a strength masked as a cute, fake weakness for me; but it is a real, deep-rooted, and debilitating weakness. Ya girl cares way. too. much. About EVERYTHING. 

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TWENTY BY TWENTY | 2. remember the past, but don't dwell on it

Since middle school, adults have always told us to "live in the moment." They were all "these are the best years of your life!!!" and made sure we felt guilty for wasting even a millisecond of it. There's nothing inherently wrong with "living in the moment." The problem lies in prolonging the moment to such an extent that it becomes living in the past. Living in the past is a really attractive option, especially when we tend to romanticize the past and fear the future. The past is comfortable because we know everything about it and the future is terrifying because we have no clue what it holds. And while being comfortable is safer and entering the unknown is scary, the latter is definitely more exciting and rewarding. I have a story to prove it. 

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TWENTY BY TWENTY | 1. stop apologizing

I turned twenty a couple weeks ago, which is quite honestly still hard for me to grasp. I look like a thirteen year old, have the decision-making abilities of a 6 month old, and I burp like a forty year old man. If anyone wonders why or how I am constantly suffering an identity crisis, this is it. Nonetheless, I am twenty. Naturally my first thought as a now non-teenager was to share my bountiful wisdom with the online community. You know, because I'm so smart and worldly. 

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